And Knowing When to Seek Help!

By Dr Jenny Draisey, Clinical Psychologist

Everybody gets anxious! Regardless of age, gender, class or ethnicity, anxiety is a normal emotion and it is here to stay! Childhood is full of new situations, new things to learn and lots of meeting new people – as a parent, we should expect our children to feel a little bit nervous about all of these situations. However, when anxiety begins to interfere with daily life, it’s essential for parents to be able to recognise the warning signs, know how to respond in the moment, but also understand when to seek professional help. In this blog, we’ll explore the common signs of anxiety in children and provide guidance on how to take the next steps.

Understanding Anxiety in Children

Anxiety is a natural response to stress and can even be beneficial in small doses, helping children stay alert and focused. However, when anxiety becomes overwhelming or persistent, it can prevent a child from enjoying normal activities and achieving their goals.

Common Signs of Anxiety in Children

Children may not always have the words to express their feelings of anxiety, so it’s important to observe their behaviours and physical symptoms. Here are some signs to watch for:

Behavioural Signs

• Avoidance: Reluctance to go to school, join social activities, or participate in hobbies they previously enjoyed.
• Excessive Clinginess: Constant need for reassurance and a reluctance to be away from parents or caregivers.
• Meltdowns or Tantrums: Outbursts that seem disproportionate to the situation, often triggered by changes or stress.
• Over-preparation or Perfectionism: Spending excessive time on tasks to avoid making mistakes.

Physical Symptoms

• Stomach-aches or Headaches: Frequent complaints of pain with no apparent medical cause.
• Fatigue or Sleep Problems: Difficulty falling asleep, staying asleep, or experiencing nightmares.
• Restlessness: Fidgeting, nail-biting, or difficulty sitting still.

Emotional Indicators

• Irritability: Becoming easily frustrated or upset by minor issues.
• Fearfulness: Expressing fears about unlikely scenarios, such as catastrophic events.
• Excessive Worry: Persistent concerns about school, friendships, or family safety.

What Causes Anxiety in Children?

Anxiety can develop as a result of various different and competing factors. These include:

• Genetics: Some people have a family history of anxiety disorders, or are just genetically predisposed to be more likely to experience anxiety
• Environment: Stressful life events such as parental discord and divorce, moving house or schools, or significant bullying, among others, can all affect a child’s development of anxiety.
• Personality Traits: Some children are naturally more sensitive or perfectionistic, and this can influence the way they see the world and their resulting anxiety levels.

When Should Parents Seek Help?

While occasional anxiety is normal, parents should consider seeking professional help if:

• The Child Experiences Persistent Symptoms: The child’s anxiety may last for several weeks or months without any improvement, particularly if a specific trigger or stressful life event has passed and the anxiety remains significant.
• The Anxiety Causes a Significant Impact/Interference on Daily Life: The child’s anxiety may interfere with their ability to go to school, socialise, or complete everyday tasks.
• The Child Complains of Frequent Physical Health Concerns: The child may complain of frequent stomach-aches, headaches, or other unexplained symptoms, despite medical evaluation revealing no physical issue.
• The Child Presents with Intense Levels of Fear or Distress: The child may experience panic attacks or exhibit extreme fear or distress over seemingly minor situations.

Steps to Take if You Suspect Anxiety

• Talk to Your Child: Open a conversation about their feelings. Use age-appropriate language and reassure them that it’s okay to feel anxious.
• Consult Your GP: Rule out any medical causes for physical symptoms and get a referral if necessary.
• Seek Professional Support: A clinical psychologist or therapist can help identify the root cause of the anxiety and provide strategies to manage it effectively.

Practical Tips for Parents

• Validate Their Feelings: Avoid dismissing their fears. Instead, acknowledge their situation and feelings, and offer love and reassurance.
• Model Calm Behaviour: Children often take cues from their parents. Stay calm and composed during stressful situations and they are less likely to panic that something is seriously wrong with them, because it isn’t!
• Teach Coping Skills: Introduce simple techniques like deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, or mindfulness exercises (lots of these can be found online).
• Encourage Gradual Exposure: Help your child face their fears in small, manageable and realistic steps, rather than avoiding them altogether.

Final Thoughts

Recognising the signs of anxiety in children is the first step in supporting their emotional well-being. With the right help and tools, children can learn to manage their anxiety and build their resilience for the future. If you’re concerned about your child’s anxiety, please don’t hesitate to reach out for professional support. You are not alone in this journey, and help is available.

Would you like further guidance or support? I specialise in helping families to support their children in managing anxiety and building confidence. Feel free to reach out to schedule a parent support session, or sign up for my newsletter for additional tips and resources.

For more support or if you would like some additional help with supporting your child with anxiety, please do get in touch with Dr Jenny Draisey on jen@drjen-psychology.co.uk to book your parent support session today!